15 days to go…

Today was just an all around weird, weird, weird day. I got some much needed rest, but it put me in a funk. Sleeping too much always makes me unhappy with myself and makes me feel crummy in general. I had a pretty bad headache most of the day.

For breakfast aka LUNCH aka AFTERNOON SNACK (haha) I had two bowls of cereal, milk, and an apple. Other than that I had a slimfast 100 calorie snack bar, some sea-salted almonds, some greek yogurt, and a few spoonfuls of peanut butter. Weird, right?  

I played soccer today instead of going to the gym. I only know one of the guys really well and don’t know ANY of the girls, so it was prettyyy awkward. The girls all had big, pushy personalities and my little shy self finds that incredibly intimidating. They were able to back it up with their awesome soccer skills, so I was even more intimidated. I understand where they’re coming from because I can be intimidating and competitive in things, but I feel like I’m not unapproachable. It’s not that I find big personalities intimidating as much as I don’t like the pushiness aspect and the crass behavior and language these girls used! Anyways, while I was feeling pretty small in comparison to everyone tonight, I got to thinking about the importance of my personality. I don’t have to DEMAND everyone’s attention all the time. I can still be sweet and quiet and kind without feeling unattractive or unwanted. I don’t have to compromise those qualities to feel loved or feel important. That’s just my personality in the same way that those girls are fierce and confident in themselves. I would rather people thought of me as kind, gentle, and sweet rather than pushy, loud, and bold. But, it’s important to have both kinds of people in this world. I need not be afraid to be myself. I pray that the Lord will cultivate the tenderness in me so that I can have confidence in my soft spirit – so that I can be me, bravely. 



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